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⚠️I HAVE VERY STRANGE THOUGHTS⚠️
It is 7:54pm. La la la la la. Twirly twirly. Ooh I like twirling. It’s fun. *falls over*. Oops. HEY. WHY IS THE WATER NOW COLD. *glares at thermostat*. Why does the thermostat say 36°C when it’s COLD. *turns thermostat up*. WHAT?!?! WHY IS THE HIGHEST IT CAN GO 40°C?!?! *gets out of shower*
Note: we have things on the outside of the shower that you can press so it can find the right temperature for your gender (aka, male, female, and both (ew)). I had it on the female setting.
THAT IS SEXIST. *presses the male button*. I am very upset. In fact, I am more than upset. I am distraught. Why should I have to pretend to be someone I’m not just so that I can have the right temperature. 😡. Ahhh. Perfect. OH NO NO NO THE WATER IS HOT THERMOSTAT WHY ARE YOU NOT THERE TO PROTECT ME FROM HOT WATER. I SET YOU TO 44°C. AAAAAAAAA. IT BURNS. *rapidly tries to turn thermostat down*. Oh wait. What happens if I put on both? Ooh. Interesting. *presses the ‘both’ button*. Ahh. Perfect. Wait. I’m going to stand here for 10 seconds to make sure it’s actually perfect. Good. It is still perfect. Oh £&@$. I forgot to take my mascara of. I’m going to look like a panda. *checks in mirror*. I look like a panda. Ooh does that make me a panda? Do pandas eat eucalyptus. Or is that koalas? OH WAIT NO THEY EAT BAMBOO! Do they? Ooh we have bamboo in the garden. 😊. Wait can I sing? No probably not. *sings* NEVER MIND I’LL FIND SOMEONE LIKE YOUUUUUU. I WISH NOTHING BUT THE BESSSTTTT FOOOOORRRR YOUUUUU TWOOOOOO. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. I sound like a cow. Or a chameleon. What do chameleons sound like when they sing? Can chameleons sing? Is that a thing? Ooh that rhymes I’m a poet and I didn’t even know it! Oh that rhymes aswell! Ohhhhhhhh that’s why people always say that! I’m a genius! I think I should have won an award at the Brits. I think I would be amazing. Oh. I forgot to bring the shampoo in. And the conditioner. And my shower gel. And the face stuff. OH MY GOD WHY IS LIFE SO HARD. *get out of shower and tiptoes over to the other bathroom. Grabs all the stuff and sneaks back* phew I made it. I felt like a detective. Ooh I could be James Bond! *pretends to shoot things* pow pow pow. *giggles*. Am I weird? Is this weird? I’m confused. Wait. If the plural of hippopotamus is hippopotami, and the plural of rhinoceros is rhinoceri, and the plural of octopus is octopi, and the plural of cactus is cacti, then what is the plural of genius? Is it geniuses? Or genii? Oh that sounds weird. jeen-ee-eye. Ha! I’m a genius! Wait. Did I put my phone on charge? Why do I keep waiting? What am I waiting for? Am I waiting for a taxi? Oh god what time is it? I NEED TO GET THE TAXI. *quickly gets hair done and stuffs*. Okay. I’m all ready for the taxi. *gets out the shower for the third time*. Ooh I do love showers. *dries self*. *walks in to bedroom* OH MY GOD ITS 9:23! Oops.
So there we go? I hope I didn’t creep you out too much with my weird shower thoughts. Ugh now I have to do nominations. Okay. I nominate anyone who likes this post. No that’s not self promo I’m just tired😂😁.